K-Fed Encouraged To Think Outside the Bun

“Dear Mr. Federline,

First off, congratulations on your upcoming Super Bowl ad. We heard it's generating a lot of talk, particularly about working in the fast food industry.

We know you respect those who work in our business. In fact, last year you said in an interview, "My kids are going to have to learn what a real job is, what life is. You don't have it easy with me. Period. My kids are going to work at Taco Bell."

We're flattered, but obviously they're too young to work for us. So here's our offer to you: Come work for us, just for a one hour shift. We'll get you a uniform, a custom name tag and show you what a great place Taco Bell is to work. We'll even reward customers who visit that restaurant with an order of our new Carne Asada Steak Grilled Taquitos for free.

We encourage you to continue to "Think Outside the Bun" and hope you accept our tasty offer.

Sincerely,
Greg Creed
President
Taco Bell Corp.“

This is really what K-Fed needs, a real job that doesn’t suck unlike his wife beaters and rap CD.


Full Article @ PopSugar

Vista To Run Life Support Systems?

"While on a trip in Europe, Bill Gates claimed Vista is so secure and reliable that it could even run life support systems in hospitals."

Would you put your life on the line with a Microsoft product? This gives a new meaning to the phrase "the blue screen of death", Billy G. is bold. Real bold.

I Didn't Like the Way My Face Was Lookin'

Mike Tyson is quite the character. Here are his comments about the tattoo on his face: "I just wanted to put something on my face," Tyson added. "I didn't like the way my face was looking."

Full CNN News Report

Chihuahua Vs. Japanese Beetle - Who wins?

After a scurry Friday, a japanese beetle has totally ingested the wuss-like Chihuahua. "I knew those new biting lady bugs were vicious, but I thought for sure the Chihuahua would win, boy was I wrong, what a mess!" A little girl weeps in the corner as her best-friend is gone forever. Stay tuned for more details on this tragic event.

The Proper Way to Cut A Tree

"Smart, reallll smart."

Just another informational video on spiders.

Madden Impersonator

"I think one of those two teams is prolly gonna win the game"

Some things are better than a hefty paycheck

Living sparingly these days, Dan Hempney, 47, gives us a little insight of how it really feels to live the life rolling on wooden wheels. Growing up Dan Hempney had everything. His parents owned a very successful textile mill in Hampton, Virginia. “We had a house, cars, pet goats, and even a tractor to mow the field”, he told reporters. “I would play in coil mines and ditches all day, and that wasn’t all that bad.” Coming from a childhood like that, Dan changed his life and decided to stop paying bills and live “like the Native American’s did, you know, back in the day”.

After reading a few history books on Native Americans, which Dan calls a history degree from ‘Daniel University’, he wanted to be a role model for what he feels our country really stands for. He built his own horse drawn carriage at 35 and continues to use it as transportation and as his living quarters. “When I’m not riding in my carriage, I am walking” he says, “and there’s nothin’ wrong with that.”

When winter hits, Dan has a lot to prepare for. “It gets cold, but my buffalo fur keeps me warm. It’s cheaper than a heated house and there are other benefits too”, which he declined to mention. “I see all these people living in houses and such, there’s no morals in that, all a person needs is the light of the moon, a bald eagle, and a little food here and there!”

When we asked if he ever got hungry, he stated “I sometimes get hungry, and a nice buffalo always gives me my fill for the week” as he continues to track a herd across the Great Plains while he gently sips on his homemade water canteen made out of a buffalo stomach. “This is really the life, screw technology and buying food in grocery stores, Americans have everything all wrong, it’s about our roots, we must teach children the Native American Way early in life to be successful as a country.”